Today's All-Time Low

Unlike a week ago, today is a bit more somber and less action-packed. Let me count the ways.

1. First of all, the weather is cloudy and rainy, which immediately dampens any sunny disposition.

2. I woke up at 6:30am to attend this 8am CRM dialogue in downtown, but was too sleepy and slow that I did not get a chance to eat proper breakfast (a piece of bagel with cream cheese). To think I went for the free food. Not really. It was interesting to listen to CRM experts from Citigroup, Harte-Hanks, Starwood and Mars.

3. I went to the office and did research about philanthrophy all day online, only to end up talking to my boss about how her husband died 14 years ago. There was so much sorrow and love in her eyes, that it felt like it happened just a week ago. Love still exists in this world, thank goodness.

4. I bought a tuna salad sandwich with fries for lunch. It was the nearest sandwich place I could see and I could not travel far - I could have fainted due to my lack of a proper breakfast.

5. I went home to a quiet and empty apartment, and played whatever's in my CD player: Hale's "Kung Wala Ka" (how depressing). I listen to this as I eat my pathetic tuna salad leftover. Makes me miss home, my big family and our dinner feasts!

But, hey, there are some redeeming factors!

1. My Moto Razr case arrived from Amazon already!

2. I saw 2 Lamborghinis parked inside Grand Central! In the flesh. I could win it for only $1,000 per raffle ticket!

3. I didn't forget my umbrella.

4. Fall is officially here. :)

5. I learned today that despite everything - somber moods, lows, highs, through life and death, Love will stay on earth.

It's your fault, Asphaire!

I am stuck in school in front of a computer, and this is probably the best time I could fill out this little tag of yours, Asphaire. I’ll do my best to give justice to all these items, following reflecting and writing about my future plans 20 years from now, just minutes ago – which islong overdue for my family to see (I'll explain next time):

20 YEARS AGO:
I turned 4 too! I was born a Cancer, and lived in Zamboanga City as a young child. I was already taking Kindergarten for 2 years (I started at 2) and was classmates with my Ate for a while. I had “graduated” from bringing my baby bottle as my baon to class – I seriously don’t remember, but my mom tells this story as vividly as it just happened yesterday.

15 YEARS AGO:

Two years into moving to Manila already, I still missed my Zamboanga friends terribly. It was a lot of adjustment, considering the big shift from provincial to cosmopolitan living. I shared a bedroom with my 2 sisters, and played My Little Pony all day (not really). We were all rivals to our baby brother in getting our parents’ attention. Since almost all of us were reaching puberty, we were pretty itchy about privacy and having our own room – which my parents gladly gave us when we had our house renovated to 3-storeys. Around that time, I started my period, and had it in school (during recess) - I knew what it was, but was freaked out. A good friend who had it already was so nice to lend me a pad. I remember it so vividly, like it's a milestone.

10 YEARS AGO:

I was taking High School in a private all-girls school and had my first puppy-love boyfriend – well, at that time, I thought that was “it”. I had my first (and last) prom, which proved to be quite memorable, in hindsight. Oh, also, I was President of the Library Club! (what the…?) I graduated in High School at age 15. I was shy and timid on the outside, but a wildflower inside.

5 YEARS AGO:

I was 19 and on a roll. I met David in Beijing, China – unknowing and unassuming of what was ahead. I was very active in college – participated in several theatre plays as lead actress (I actually had a solo song! I pitied the audience after!), elected in the Student Executive Board as Secretary, I was drinking and partying a lot and was staying out in the evenings like there’s no tomorrow (I think it’s still a phase). It was around this time that I realized that I wanted to be in Communications. Our Dean inspired me. I was also finishing my MA in Communications at this time, and gained interest in the wacky world of Advertising. And so I got a stint at JWT to handle their bread and butter account, Unilever. I was also fortunate to be able to travel to different countries already – and that’s where this passion for travel began. I visited New York for the first time, fell in love with it and knew in my heart, I will go back in the future. I then looked back to that timid high school girl (in braces), smiled and said farewell to her.

THREE YEARS AGO:

I was 21 and accepted a job as an Account Manager in this small promotional marketing agency in Manila and was promoted to Marketing Manager a year after. I had a salary that lets me pay parking in Makati, a lenient boss and plenty of travel perks! It was all good. I got to stay in 5-star hotels, ate the best food, and had the best full-body massages - as they let me meet with major Clients in Asia (alone most of the time). I was also sent to Europe (twice!) to attend conferences in upscale places like Nice, France and Malaga, Espana. Of course, I would do side trips, and that’s where my Europe photo collection increased exponentially. Meanwhile, me and my family had somehow developed this obsession to travel, hopping from one country to another: China, Australia, Europe (again!), UK, South Africa (I loved Cape Town), Thailand, Singapore, weekends in Hong Kong, etc. Travel is such a hobby, that I really wished we had more time (and money) and just be more obsessed with it.

It was the year that my horizons were widened, that I knew in my heart, Manila is such a small place to live in. And I thought about New York again.

LAST YEAR:

Despite getting my heart sliced and diced, and breaking hearts just the same in the many years past, I was resilient and easily fell in love with David. It was one of those things that just happens for a reason. I sent him postcards from all of my travels. He sent me photos and love letters in exchange. It was a beautiful LDR.

At this time, David and I have been together for over a year, and after several exchanges of visits between Manila and SF (where he was based), we just wanted and needed to be together. So, he was doing job interviews for expat jobs in Manila, while I applied to different Grad Schools in the US. I got into all three schools I applied to (Berkeley, Columbia, NYU) and decided on NYU. I had already moved to NY when Dave got the McKinsey job :) (He's so brilliant!) My parents and family are so supportive. Especially my dad, though it broke his heart to see his baby daughter leave, he still let me go.

THIS YEAR:
I’m finally studying and living in New York and making the most out of it. I meet all kinds of people from all kinds of backgrounds, making me realize that the world is so large and there is so much to discover. In the summer, I went to Spain and got mugged, which forced me to go back home to renew my visa. David went to Manila to see me, and it was great. He also got accepted into the best B-schools in the US (CBS, Yale, Stern) and eventually chose Yale. (Yipee, just 1.5 hours away!) He began this Fall Semester.

YESTERDAY:
I had a full schedule! Woke up, drank coffee, worked all day, contemplated on getting a furry pet, went to class, had drinks with my classmates afterwards and went home.

LAST NIGHT:
I had a Corona at Bryant Park Bar with my classmates – from India, Romania, Taiwan, US and Korea. Our talks ranged from our crazy professors, to gossips, to why Filipinos have such good English accents (I don't know why), to doing a girls night out two weeks from now.

TODAY:
I’m writing this blog all day (not really).

TOMORROW:
I’ll probably be in the arms of my Sweetie and eating at Friendly’s.

NEXT YEAR:
I’m getting married. Or not? You’ll be surprised. :)

FIVE - TEN YEARS FROM NOW:
I’ll have my own family, I’ll set up my own boutique IMC agency, have my own wine cellar, drink plenty of it and buy my dad his well-deserved BMW.

Gosh, that was hard. The end part, I didn’t even think anymore. Sorry if the answers are so incoherent. Also, take note that these are the good parts of the past 20 years, I skipped the unnecessary ones :) I have to run to catch something now, tatah! :)

GPA

... or should I say, Great Pointed Archers! You may think I'm insane, but I did sign up for the petition to finally call these little creatures called "rats" to something else more dignified. NY Rats are gross, but they are not bad creatures. Check it out before you say "hey" or "ney" Mickey! Or just simply enjoy navigating the site! Wouldn't hurt.

Pregnant Woman Practicing

I saw a very pregnant woman today pushing a baby stroller with no baby on it. I was looking around to find her toddler, but there was none. She is probably going through that impatient-mom-to-be syndrome.

A Monday Trip

Let me recount what this city generously offered me today.

I woke up this morning to Katie Couric and Matt Lauer and Today's Fall Fashion recommendations. According to them, brown is so hot and full skirts are in. After doing my morning routine and drinking my coffee, I found myself staring at my closet, finding something to wear. After scanning my highly-disorganized clothing pieces, I found this brown and blue skirt with boho-themed prints and a black top. Perfect.

I paired the outfit with my uber-comfy gold flipflops, picked up my school books and out the door I go! I left my building, looked up to say hello to the Chrysler building, walked 3 blocks to Grand Central, salivated at the same chocolate-covered strawberries at Godiva, took the express train to Union Square, picked up my daily dose of AM New York (for free), saw the same guide dog (she had a little sign saying "Don't pet me, I'm working") helping a blind person, briskly crossed the street on a blinking "Don't Walk" sign and walked towards my office. I was already looking forward to a good day, but also wondering if that was how routinary my life will be in the next months. And then, the unexpected happened...

I tripped. (tadaaaa!!!)

Because living in New York would subject you to uneven pavements, dirty streets and wet floors (and train tracks!), it's inevitable that even wearing your flattest and most comfy shoes would bar you from getting into this embarrassing thing called tripping.

So, all my books flew in the air, my favorite bag scattered its contents on the floor, my shades slid off my head and me flat on the floor. Ouch.

I was not expecting anybody to help me get up or pick up my stuff, but when I looked up, two Italian passers-by walked up to me, helped me up, picked my stuff up and exclaimed "Aphrodisia! Aphrodisia!" I wonder if it's some Italian word for Are You Okay? or if it meant something about Intimacy, or chocolates (with strawberries?). It was weird.

I stood up, thanked them profusely with my palm, knees and toe flowing with blood like the Niagra falls. Gross. (Goodbye boho chick) I rushed to my office (which was a couple of buildings away from my morning accident), buzzed myself in, climbed up the stairs and ran to the bathroom to clean up. My Yugoslavian boss was there, glad as ever to see me - but equally shocked - that she offered to get me bandages and Hydrogen Peroxide. So she went next door to her apartment just to pick it up. Things are picking up, eh? She arrived with boxes of bandages and band-aid and what may seem to be a liter of HP.

Then, bandage-clad, I proceeded with work, finishing my project proposal that was due this afternoon. When doing a last-minute proofreading and checking, my boss sat beside me at my workstation and asked what my plans are after I graduated. She asked if I see myself in the US or elsewhere. You could guess what I said. But I couldn't guess what she said afterwards. And guess what? She said she wants to train me, then hire me! She said she's been wanting to take in people like me in her company. (Hold on to your horses Sweetie, I've only interned here for a week?) It was a good thing to hear, and it brought a big smile on my face that I forgot how painful my bruises were.

On my lunchbreak, I went to the NYU bookstore to buy required readings from one of my more difficult classes. There was one last copy waiting for me specifically, that I didn't take any chances and immediately grabbed it! (God is so good to me).

Then, I dropped by this nice crepe take-out place at Greenwich Village and ordered the usual French Brie, Mozzarella and Tomato - and the guy totally put a mountain-worth of ingredients on my crepe! It was like getting 2 crepes for the price of 1. Yipee! :) I had a filling lunch and was ready to head back to work.

I went to my Creative class this evening, and mind you, this professor (CD) is known to be bad at remembering names. He's too creative for comfort - did I say that correctly? Anyway, I wasn't sure if it was class participation, or being the only Filipino in class or being 10 minutes late after the class break, but he remembered my name! Yes, Pam. Good point, Pam. Of course, he knew a couple other classmates of mine's names by heart, but it just feels nice to be called by your simple name - without being too creative.

After class and after dinner, I had a drink with my friend Mark at this bar called Fubar (F*cked up Beyond All Recognition) a few blocks up my apartment. It was laid-back, typical American sports-y bar, old worn-out couches and all. The bartender was this big bald guy, who looked like he could kill without batting an eyelash. I saw that there were several bills from countries all over the world displayed behind the counter! It was their way to stylishly decorate their less-than-original set-up. I was looking for the Philippine Peso bill, and found none. (Either Pinoys don't go there, or they don't have Php's in their wallets handy!) I opened my wallet and found a crisp Php 20 bill, and handed it to the bartender!

"Would you put this up for me please? From my country, The Philippines."

And he did, it was up there in a matter of seconds.

Then, I ordered my usual (Bailey's on the rocks), but this time I said "with Cherries" (not "with a cherry", as I would normally say). And, voila, 4 wonderful cherries arrived on my lap unexpectedly! Yahoo! That must've been worth my Php20! - Which isn't a large amount, but would have much more value. Pinoy po ito!

So, that pretty much explains today's adventures and misadventures. And it's just beginning. It's just Monday anyway.

Aphrodisia! Aphrodisia! It resounds in my head...

Compromise

Wouldn't it be nice if there are no fights, arguments and irreconcileable differences? Wouldn't it be perfect to live like everything you think, say and do are always right, in the right place and the right time? Alas, there is no such thing, and we have to accept that. Most of the time, we are left to being humanly wrong, yet humanly able to compromise. Compromising that exists in different levels - some you accept effortlessly, some you let by, and some that break the deal.

Since you co-exist with different kinds of people, personalities and race, you can never even dream of living in a vacuum that you call your own world. The rest of the world is bigger than you, and most of the time, you just have to succumb - with or without compromising.

Piece of Cake

My roommate sleeptalked at 2am, screaming ever so loudly "Aahhhh! Help me!", and of course I was awoken in shock. I wondered if he's ok and thought about what he might have dreamt for a second, and went back to sleep.

I woke up in the morning and he's gone. Ah okay, he's probably alive and fine, I thought.

So I left that for work, errands, school stuff and looked forward to getting home.

Back in my apartment, I found a note posted on my pantry. It was from my roommate, saying he hoped he did not wake me up, and that there's chocolate cake for me in the fridge. ;-) Alleluia.

Fall Routine and In Between

So my Fall classes have started and I have tons of readings and papers due. My classmates are still as diversely wacky as they can be, and my teachers are still as engaging as I expected.

Back in the Spring semester, I was able to go through school with limited morning and afternoon activities. I really hated Winter (and snowstorms), that I cocooned all the time. (But, of course, David will attest to this! Haha.) I wanted to stay in most of the time because of that lame excuse of "not having anything to wear" - since I am all covered up with winterwear, that my beautiful lacey and silk top became irrelevant. Sayang naman ang porma.

My Winter/Spring routine was practically this way: wake up-study-go to class-have drinks/gimmick-study again-sleep-wake up again. I had enough time to focus on my academics, that it paid off pretty well in the end. It was my time to get a "feel" of the environment and my chance to adjust to New York.

Months past, and summer is almost over, Fall is coming really soon. How much will this weather change my routine? Here's what happens on a normal day - give or take:

I wake up in the morning and prepare for my day (approx. 1 hour).
I force myself to go to the gym at Union Square (approx. 2 hours).
I walk three long blocks to intern at this integrated marketing communications agency - cool people, cool office (4 hours)!
I go to the library and study for class (3 hours) and/or I work on campus (3 hours).
I attend my class in the evening (3 hours).
I go home and do homework (3 hours).

That's 16 hours non-stop. That's on a weekday. That's not too bad, right? Not a slacker, nor a work-addict?

Weekends are much more pleasant - I could totally sleep in until after lunch and be immobile. But of course, I can't be without a night in town on a Friday or Saturday! Over these past weeks, I've developed a love for the Downtown area - specifically Soho, the Village, East Village and Greenwich area. I just love it.

Anyway, since I've unconsciously developed some wacky schedule this Fall, I wanted to set some goals for myself:

1. lose 10 lbs.
2. expand my network
3. get 8 hours of sleep
4. dance more
5. write more

Actually, the whole point of me being a busy bee is because Yale MBA's first semester is supposed to be the toughest - couples have broken up during this time, seriously (and no wonder the "Partners Club" at Yale is so active! I'm in it, in case you are wondering.). And although David has given me all the attention I deserve when I want it, I could not just afford to let him take his schooling for granted. Besides, we're both working on something really important for our future. It's pretty tough, but we're getting by.

Bikini Lambast

Why do most Filipinas on Friendster have at least one Boracay photo and one with them in a bikini? Are swimsuits too cool (yeah baby?!?)? And, wait a minute, is Boracay (or "Bora" as they oh-so cleverly call it) the only beach in the Philippines? Whatever happened to Panglao, Davao or Palawan? Will posting a photo with 10% clothing in public put them a notch ahead? Do they really want their bodies to have that much mileage? Summer is over, guys! Move on, please.

Is this plain showing off, an I'd-like-to-be-in-the-cover-of-FHM-but-can't-so-Friendster-would-do kind of frustration or a display of insecurity? I think it's all three, and I think it's shallow. As in the super low kind of shallow.

Feel free to sue me, it's a personal opinion.

If you disagree with me and are one of the thousands who post bikini photos, maybe you can get away with it if a) you are pretty and have a well-proportioned body, b) you shaved, c) the photo was taken in good taste and d) your fully clothed photos outnumber your tiny bikinis. Thank you.

But really, are you THAT insecure? Think about it.