The Case of the Exes

I have never written about my exes. They are three in total. As I grew older and wiser, I realized that the best (if not the worst) metaphor for exes are they are like the Uptown E train: you take it - not to get to its final Queens destination, but to get off in Manhattan.

I don’t like writing about exes, I don’t like it because: a) I have terminated their (air)time in my life (including any form of activity using all parts of my body, my brain, my thoughts, even my dreams), b) my role as an ego-feeder has expired, and c) reliving love-then-hate relationships gives me nightmares. So, for everyone’s sake, I leave my memories back home, in a beat-up cardboard box in my bedroom closet, never to be opened again.

Of course, sometimes, you inevitably hear about an ex. More so, you hear from an ex. And you unconsciously remember how nice and caring he was -- the dozen cones of flowers, the heartfelt letters, the smiles, the gazes, all the winged-hearts surrounding your auras, the way he held you.

Free-falling. Memories.

And then, as you recollect the sequence of events in the years you’ve been together, the bad memories suddenly fall on top of you like a ton of bricks! The yelling, the screaming, the cussing, the cursing. The jealousy, the lies, the hatred, the tears, the regret, the pride. They all come rushing back creating chaos inside you. You grit your teeth and tell yourself, “I was so stupid.” The bad offsets the good, and the good stuff are put away in a box.

But you moved on! That’s what exes are for. They hit you hard and you learn hard. But there is good in the overall experience, because you come out as a better and brighter person – with a cuter, smarter and more mature man.

The world is too small, at least for me and the people around me. With the preponderance of Friendster and unlimited network-to-network calls, I can’t help but hear about all sorts of (unnecessary and surprising) information about my friends, peers and yes, of course, my exes.

Two of them have already married and the other one has found new happiness, just by being "happy". ;) Hmmm...right...

Anyway!

Speaking of which, inspite of (air)time expirations and brickloads of good and bad memories, I would not fail to offer Happiness to my exes. I am happy for all the decisions we made before, during and after the relationship, no matter how bitter or traumatic. I am happy for those who have found their One. I am happy that they are happy (in every sense of the word). Best of all, I am happy that they are out of my life, otherwise I wouldn't have found my One and am this happy (in every sense of the word, that I can't even measure it)! (Note: Sorry for the delay on romantic blogs. I try to do this bits, pieces and particles at a time! Haha!)

Sounds very cliche, but exes do leave lasting marks in a person's life (good or bad), and we bring a part of them with us everyday. And somehow a part of us just wants to be thankful they came along - no matter how much we swear to leave them behind, put them in a box and lock them in a closet - 10,000 miles from here.