Be

When we are younger, we have simpler dreams. Everyday, these dreams grow bigger and limitless. And we are taught that we can be anybody we want to be. We can just be and we will be well.

Let me backtrack a bit.

All I ever wanted when I was 9 was to be a My Little Pony collector.
When I was 12, I wanted to be a "cool" teenager and have my own bedroom.
At 15, I wanted to be pleasing to my parents, get good grades, get into a good college and learn how to drive a stick shift.
When I turned 16, I wanted to be thin, lose weight, cultivate great friendships and wear trendy heels.
I wanted to be a Masters Degree graduate when I was 18.
A year after, I worked towards the dream of being in New York.
At 20, I wanted to be more independent and get a job that would let me buy Starbucks coffee everyday, and pay ridiculous parking fares.
At tender 21, I wanted to be traveling and travel-writing all over the world.
Now I'm 23, and all my dreams in the past have become reality, I want to find my next aspiration, live my passions and go dancing!

It seems like as we grow older, our dreams become more complex (feel free to correct me here). Everyday, you discover people and things that make you aspire to be somebody, to be somewhere. And you have the people who have been there with you since you were young (and aspiring to be the biggest My Little Pony collector) to thank for.

More than just keeping with the Filipino tradition of utang na loob, I consciously indebt myself to my parents for a very long time. Without their support and push, I wouldn't be where I am today. For the times that they've accepted what I fought for and what I believed in over dinner (as against their rules), for the many times that they have taught me values by being good examples, and their incredible ability to provide us with comfort and smiles despite life's adversities. They are awesome, and I don't think I could have any better set of folks in my life. Someday, I will be able to repay them in whatever fashion - personal success, perhaps? (with its infinite definitions).

I am also very grateful for my siblings Ate Abby, Doyti and Jay-ar, and the rest of my relatives. I am fortunate to have such caring sisters and brother, that even if they are far away now, I know they send me prayers to keep me safe and out of harm. We are always just pakipot, but deep inside, we love each other the way siblings do. We would get into each other's nerves sometimes, however, we would still fight great battles and kill for each other. Clearly we have different personalities and plans, but we support and cover up for each other, sometimes to my parents' chagrin. ;-)

I miss my family a lot, and living away from them will not make it any better. But as selfish as it may sound, whatever choices I make in life (large and small), and no matter how much my dreams get simpler or more complex every time, I know they will always have my back and will never cease to just let me be. I would do the same for them without question (but with care).