No Competition

Unless you come from circa 1600 and could not accept it, most likely, your current lover has had an ex lover or an apple of his eye. Yes, it is a has been and it is soooo over, but sometimes you can’t help but feel a pinch of insecurity whenever you come across some voluntary (or involuntary) public (or private) information these exes put on your nosy platter.

Of course, there are exes who are unworthy of anything but bashing, but there exists the opposite. Let me define further. This breed of exes are:

1. Within your league – meaning they hang out with the same types of people, studied in a reputable university, does what you do and gets what you get
2. Eye and Brain Candies – the perfect combination of a looker (especially in a bikini) and a mind picker
3. The Ones That Got Away - he may not say it nor admit it, but this label can never be yours (of course, ‘cause you’re not going anywhere, right?)

So what does a girl like you (who is so interested in reading this blog entry) to do? Do you google his ex’s name nonstop until you find some dirt on her to make you feel better? Do you forever compare the way your sweetheart said “I can’t wait to see you” to you versus the way he did to her? Do you stare at their photos together to check if she has crooked teeth and flabby arms or if you have a smaller waist line?

But what if all this childish detective work finds you no less than an affirmation that there’s nothing really wrong with her? And, unbeknownst to her, she is just a person who can potentially ruin your day? And you let her get away with it (even if it’s within your control)?

Do you still go on with your voodoo doll ritual and stick needles to prick her until she bleeds? Or do you just exhale and believe that there is some compelling reason that no Google, Friendster or any other public display of information, can simply distinguish why she is not with your lover now? That in your lover’s mind and heart, you are a universe apart and far better off than her (plus she does have crooked teeth). And there is no competition.